I can't describe them but if I see them I will know. I WILL KNOW!
I desperately need them. Like yesterday.
This weekend was filled with senseless shopping by myself. I spent way to much money and came home with only like 2 sweaters. Two! God damn me and my mindless throw-shit-in-the-bag I don't look at price tags when I shop. It's a problem I can't seem to get over no matter how broke I am.
I went shopping alone. Which is probably best since I take for-fucking-ever to squeeze pants in size 8 knowing my ass is a size bigger than that but hoping but some sort of miracle they are the super stretchy kind and will compliment my behind. No suck luck ladies. Nope. None.
That was me Saturday. Me and shopping hanging out like best buds.
Since I got ditched. Twice this weekend. Yeah TWICE. Two seemed to be following me around like a clingy little fucker all damn week.
SOO What the fuck is that my lady friends?
Ditching me like that.
No matter I'm not bitter.
What? I SAID I'M NOT FUCKING BITTER, JUST LEAVE IT BE ALL READY!
STOP TALKING ABOUT IT!
So what I was ditched and forced to hang out with myself. I am a cool motherfucker just so you know, so BAM! In your face. Jokes on you bitches.
Anyway. So there I was in the mall crowded with snotty nosed children, emo teenagers with bad haircuts and judgmental women and their eyebally husbands/boyfriends. Looking for those boots that I need.
Preferably black suede ones that go up my legs and stop mid-thigh. Oh my that sounds so fantastic.
Look at all of these lovelies:
Anywho. I went into four to five stores where I might have found them. One major problem. They didnt have my size. IN ALL four to five STORES! It was like some sort of intervention from the boot gods. Just terrible.
What is that about people? I just want some kick ass boots for the winter. That's all! Oh that and some motherfucking glass garland that Target seems to be holding out on me.
I did find a pair of short boots, but its not the same.
I know.. women, right? Fucking crazies with our wants/needs.
I will find you boots MARK MY WORDS I WILL FIND YOU!!!!!! BWAHAHA (Evil cackling)
*Update!!!!
I totally forgot about this. I came across these horrid boots. I mean they were the most unsightly footwear I have almost ever seen. I texted Derek and Jen to tell them I was gonna get these. It did not go over well. As you can see for yourself why:
Jen said it would have worked out if I was a Mexican midget in the circus. Maybe that's my new calling in life. I should have bought them just to have ugly boots. AHAHA
Oh one more thing I wanted to say outside of my boot talk.
While in math class the other night this girl who I think must be a horrible listener and/or major stoner/meth addict raises her hand and says and I quote (I wrote it down as soon as it came out her mouth and am making it my "saying of the year")
"As long as we have the answer right it's righttttttttt?" her head tilted sideways and her eyes squinted in a serious manner. She was not joking.
I stood on my chair and started belting out ♪♫♫♪Feels so right it can't be wrong ♪♫.....
That might have been imagined but let's roll with it.
....
Silence engulfed the class for a millisecond
That was the question.
A question she needed an answer to.
Seriously.
Our instructor looked like he wanted to jump over the desk and bitch slap her.
It took all I had to not laugh out loud.
What kind of stupid ass question is that?
There were so many things that I could have said, but I just sat there and absorbed the question.
I kept on repeating it to myself over and over again because I couldn't comprehend why one would ask if something was right always right and not wrong.
Shoulder shrug.
Theres that.
Rox



i love them all!
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